We are told what to do till a certain age and then we have to take that responsibility on to ourselves(though our mothers will keep telling us what to do regardless of age ;-)). Depending on our circumstances, fantasies, abilities, maturity we decide on a vocation, hobbies, social responsibilities, etc. and get busy with our lives and seldom give a thought to what this is all about as long as we are busy “doing” something.
Being busy becomes a habit which is very difficult to shake off and a dependence is created upon being busy, so much so that people feel lost if they have nothing to do. This is because the habit of meditating, introspection, and reflection has not been cultivated since it is perceived as doing nothing. People instead turn to religion/prayer for answers but, in my view, religion has lost the plot long back since the interpreters of religion have their own vested interests that do not include guiding you to go within since who then is going to ask/pay them? Further, if you notice, prayers are transactional in nature – please give me…. if you do this for/give this to me, then i will do this…
For knowing yourself and for being comfortable with yourself, you need to just sit in silence and observe all the thoughts that come to your mind and allow them to pass, over a period of time through sustained practice, the mind settles and no thoughts arise and you get insights into your true nature – that is “being”. You have to cultivate & practice this habit for yourself, no one else can do this for you. Once the habit is cultivated there is a paradigm shift even in your “doing”.
As Thich Naht Hanh beautifully put it “Our quality of being determines our quality of doing”
Bodhisattva 