Existence is a zero sum game – everything is just a form of energy and change in energy form doesn’t affect the underlying power, much like what we do to sun rays has no effect on the sun itself…

It’s the understanding of what life is all about that makes a difference. All of us can observe that everything is impermanent, all that is born has an expiry date and despite that we create attachments to people, things, titles, ideas,… and suffer them at leisure.

The code to living a peaceful life is simple to understand but difficult to implement since it is like trying to live sanely in a madhouse wherein it’s easier to accept the madness rather than to practice sanity….Nevertheless it’s worth a try…

Every saint/religion has tried to introduce a code of living that would lead the society towards sanity and the essence of all such codes is recommended by Guru Nanak in his 3 point code of living:

1. Naam Japna – Remember God’s Name in every single endeavour you undertake​. This purifies your intent of engaging in action since you remind yourself that the “God” is in you as well as in everything else. ​

2. Kirat Karni – Earn your livelihood through hard work and by honest means​. This brings the pure intent to action through work ​

3. Vand Chakna – To selflessly serve and share with others especially with those less fortunate than yourself.​ This sharing is acknowledging that you are a part of the whole and that sharing is actually practicing detachment… ​

​You don’t need to read/study any religion or philosophy if you follow this code in essence, if you are able to – It would certainly  be a blessed life…​

Stop for a moment and reflect on what are you running towards in such a hurry? Has it brought you joy earlier that you think it will do so again? Mind you I am not talking of joy in the sense of “sense/desire indulging pleasures” or “ego satisfying trips”, I am talking about pure joy of just being. 

The joy when you can sleep peacefully without a care in the world and wake up to witness a magnificent sunrise, the joy of being. You can’t find it anywhere but in a peaceful mind that is uncluttered with information and desires of wanting to be somewhere else than the place you are in. 

How do you get there? Well actually you are already there, you are just not aware of it. The moment for cultivating awareness through observation is Now! Let the cares of the world sit lightly upon your mind, do what needs to be done lovingly and accept whatever comes your way with the same love and continue doing so every moment of the day and take life a moment at a time. That, my friends, is living joyfully, worth trying isn’t it? 

“Spaces in togetherness” is such a lovely way of presenting the dichotomy of relationship which exists not only between two people but also between the temporary/impermanent human form(body/mind/roles we play) and the eternal underlying substance(consciousness) of which the form is made. Both, the temporary as well as the eternal, are essential facets to the human experience. We get so enamoured and attached to the temporary form of ourselves and the relationships it has with everyone/everything around, that we forget the eternal substance that the form is made of… 

Although we are reminded of the mortality of our form time and again, we refuse to let go of our grip on the temporary form even after knowing/suspecting that we return to the eternal substance. Its this refusal to accept the eternal and clutching on to the temporary form that brings us back again and again to play the same game in a different form…

Its as if we are addicted to the temporary form along with its pleasure and pains and want to return again and again to re-experience it… This dilemma of the dichotomous relationship between the human form and the underlying eternal substance  is beautifully expressed by the Sufi Bulleshah in his couplet 

Kuch rishton ka namak hi doori hota hai, 

Na milna bhi bahut zaroori hota hai…

If you examine the roles you play son/daughter, spouse, work designation, friend, etc you seek to re-establish your identity and seek self import/relevance through them. Any relation that doesn’t give you respect is disliked and the ones which do are automatically liked and cultivated. A human is a relational being and wants to be “relevant” in the social scheme of things to gain “respect” or his/her place under the sun. This respect could come to you due to birth in a particular sect/family/wealth/etc or you have to earn it during the course of your life or both. 

People who don’t get respect from others either try to be indifferent to it or turn to undesirable ways to seek attention – become cantankerous, violent in their expression of life. The ones who work hard to establish a position for themselves in the social order of things (success) keep trying hard to maintain that relevance and the ones who don’t rely on “other means” to seek attention and life goes on. Both encase themselves into armours that suit their roles that are designed to perpetuate the feeling of respect from others, the craving for respect continues.

Both categories have got it wrong and are living outside in – whatever is important to the society or what gets me attention is what I do. Instead it must be exactly the opposite in the sense that you must find love within and then spread the love to the world around you just like a flower disperses its fragrance, relevance will follow. You have to let go of the self created armour of titles, position, possessions, relations and allow yourself to bloom like a flower and spread your fragrance. Be a simple human being by letting go of craving for relevance or respect and act for the well being of all, after all love is your nature and it doesn’t need any armour to be relevant in the world. 

Sant Kabir says:

Chaah miti, chinta miti, manwa beparwah

Jisko kuch nahi chahiye, woh Shahenshah

If your wishes end, then your anxieties and troubles will also end and your mind will be carefree. One who doesn’t crave for anything, he is a King

​Life as you observe it is lived in 3 states – waking, dreaming and deep sleep but ask yourself who is observing? There is an underlying state called the “Turiyam” that is a witness to the entire drama of cognition/energising/experiencing. This Turiyam is the manifest (Saguna) form of the unmanifest (Nirguna) which is the Source of Consciousness. 

“You” as a sum of parts (Body, mind, experience), doesn’t exist, its only modifications of consciousness somewhat like a ray of light passing through a prism appears different at both ends but in reality is the same. It can be confusing if you conduct this enquiry through words, it has to be conducted through silence to get the full import of 

“Jo hai wo nahi hai

Jo nahi hai wahi hai “

There is a difference between choosing and judging but very often the line gets blurred. Choosing is picking up one alternative from the available options whilst judging implies consideration of the options with some prior knowledge, preferences, memories, etc before choosing. Choice is conscious (Response-able) behaviour whereas judgement is pre-conditioned (reactive) behaviour.

What you choose today determines your tomorrow, in effect your destiny is ruled by the choices you make today. Most people don’t choose, they judge and feel that they are making a choice. It’s very difficult to differentiate between the two, so the best way forward is to first choose a code or a set of principles that resonate with what you wish to be and use that code/principles as a guideline to making a decision of which option to choose given the alternatives. This is conscious choosing and it could go against your “judgement – habitual response” but that is the way forward towards achieving your ideals.

The first step towards conscious choice is accepting the moment without judgement and then before responding, weighing the alternatives against your pre-decided code/principle and then choosing the one that resonates best with your code and nor your pre-conditioned judgement. Make sure that love and well being of all concerned is the foundation of your code…

If you judge people, you have no time to love them… Saint Teresa.

Sun and moon are represented in our own pranic bodies called by different names…

Ida-Pingala, Yin-Yang…

Moon represents change whilst Sun represents discipline.

Balance in both has to be established by us…

Prayer, as is normally used, is for changing the situation in our favour. Do you think that the Power that is the Source of all creation doesn’t know what you are going through, that you want to remind it to work things out in your favour?  

Prayer should not be for changing the situation, it should be for changing us to face the situation…Much like a Sufi’s prayer, which is actually a code for self transformation. As per the Sufi’s – To be near God a human must have certain qualities; these qualities are “river-like generosity, sun-like affection, and sun-like hospitality.” Ensuring the presence of these qualities in ourselves is prayer.

It all begins with good intent for all​ that is expressed through good words and good actions​ – completing the cycle of goodwill/prayer for you; good results are bound to follow sooner than later… 

Pain(of body and mind) is an inevitable part of life but suffering is a choice. If you choose to accept the pain as it is, it too shall pass, you needn’t suffer it. Suffering is when you are identified with the body / mind and therefore the pain caused to it, let the identification go – the pain may not disappear but your acceptance of it will give you the necessary forbearance and fortitude to bear it. 

Now the million dollar question is how to let go of the identification with body and mind since that is who we think we are. Sharing an interesting anecdote that could perhaps shed some light: 
King Janaka had a dream one night in which he saw that he was defeated by his enemies and he had gone to the neighbouring kingdom and was about to beg for food when he woke up and realised that he was still the King and had a Palace, servants, etc. However, the dream was so vivid that he questioned was the dream real or is his waking state real? His Guru Sage Ashtavakra replied neither was that real nor is this real, the one who was present and experienced both states is real – the presence/consciousness. The Presence/Consciousness experiences life in 3 states of waking, dreaming and deep sleep and you are that presence/consciousness in reality but get identified with the body/mind and its various roles and attachments that cause the suffering.

So the answer to the million dollar is simple as stated above but to actually experience life as sheer presence/consciousness and not the body/mind is the journey of Self Realisation which could be just a step away for a prepared mind but for the unprepared minds accepting this proposition itself, is the first step in a journey of a thousand miles but at least it is a step in the right direction…

We are told what to do till a certain age and then we have to take that responsibility on to ourselves(though our mothers will keep telling us what to do regardless of age ;-)). Depending on our circumstances, fantasies, abilities, maturity we decide on a vocation, hobbies, social responsibilities, etc. and get busy with our lives and seldom give a thought to what this is all about as long as we are busy “doing” something​.

Being busy becomes a habit which is very difficult to shake off and a dependence is created upon being busy, so much so that people feel lost if they have nothing to do. This is because the habit of meditating, introspection, and reflection has not been cultivated since it is perceived as doing nothing. People instead turn to religion/prayer for answers but, in my view, religion has lost the plot long back since the interpreters of religion have their own vested interests that do not include guiding you to go within since who then is going to ask/pay them? Further, if you notice, prayers are transactional in nature – please give me…. if you do this for/give this to me, then i will do this…

For knowing yourself and for being comfortable with yourself, you need to just sit in silence and observe all the thoughts that come to your mind and allow them to pass, over a period of time through sustained practice, the mind settles and no thoughts arise and you get insights into your true nature – that is “being”. You have to cultivate & practice this habit for yourself, no one else can do this for you. Once the habit is cultivated there is a paradigm shift even in your “doing”. 

As Thich Naht Hanh beautifully put it “Our quality of being determines our quality of doing”