Patience is the one quality that everyone needs to have since impatience leads to various undesirable consequences – anger, poor quality of work, restlessness,.. to name a few, which when left uncontrolled eventually lead to manifestation of psychosomatic diseases.

You cannot develop patience. Patience is the end result of your outlook towards life. If you believe that there is a lot you want out of life, then you would obviously be running after multiple things and have a hurry, worry, curry mindset which doesn’t have time for patience. If you know that everything is within you and there is nothing to run after, you will find time to sit quietly and then you will see patience emerge. This patience would help you in every aspect of life including achieving enlightenment if you so wish.

Your innate nature is that of patience since you are the eternal soul and yet you identify yourself with the ever changing temporary existence of your body, mind and everyone/thing around you and hence feel that you need to act before the time runs out. You chase everything that seems to give value to you until you get it and then move on to achieving the next. This is the game you play with yourself to keep your restless mind occupied, till your body and mind gets tired of this continuously repeating game. It is then that you sit down to know your true self and get over this endless cycle of desire – fulfilment…

One of the top 5 regrets of dying people is unresolved conflicts. All of us would agree that all of us are going to die and we aren’t going to be able to take anything with us wherever it is that we go when we die but we would still cling on to our possessions, opinions, ego, thoughts, positions taken in relationships, etc as if we are going to live forever.

Conflicts usually happen due to at least one party taking an unreasonable position and making it a win – lose situation. To convert it to a win – win you need to express your willingness to resolve the situation amicably – that is the beginning of the resolution of the problem at least from your side and then you could wait for the other party/ies to come forward for the resolution. The resolution may not be what you had thought of or in your view is unfair to you, then ask yourself whether it is worth holding on to the conflict versus resolving the conflict and being at peace. More often than not, you would find that a peaceful resolution is preferable and possible.

However there could be situations wherein peaceful resolution of the situation may not be possible when an unreasonable stand is taken by one or more parties concerned.This is exactly the situation that the Pandava’s were in when they asked just for one village and Duryodhana refused which started the war of Pandava’s and Kaurava’s in Mahabharata. In such a case what should one do?

Lord Krishna’s advice in Bhagvad Gita: Even Lord Krishna tried all the means available at his disposal to resolve the conflict amicably, however it didn’t work and war was the final resort – which is the worst case scenario and undesirable to all parties concerned since it is unnecessary bloodshed. But if it has to be so, it has to be so for upholding your Dharma(Duty) – you have to play your role in a detached manner without considering that it is your Guru, relative or your father figures on the other side – this is the advice that Lord Krishna gave Arjun on the battlefield to play his role as per his Dharma and fight the Adharma. So even resort to violence has to be taken to uphold your Dharma is the view expressed.

Acharya Chanakya had proposed Saam(Peaceful negotiations), Daam(Money or allurement), Dand(punishment or fear), Bhed(creating differences or divide & rule policy) to resolve conflicts.

More recently for the freedom struggle for independence of India there were people who preferred taking up arms and fighting the British whilst Mahatma Gandhi proposed Non violence as a method of dealing with all conflicts which ultimately worked.

Whilst an eye for an eye is usually considered a fair basis, it only makes both people blind and in my view is not a preferred option. On the other hand non-violence also may not work in all situations since there are situations wherein you would have to resort to violence in sheer self defence. Whichever way is required must be deployed considering the situation but resolving conflicts amicably is still the best alternative.

The best time to resolve conflicts was yesterday, the next best time is now…

“Yeh sab Maya hai” is an oft repeated quote by Spiritual Masters, which means what we are experiencing as life is actually just an illusion. This happens because we mistake the illusion for reality.

The reason why we accept an illusion as reality is explained very well by Maharishi Patanjali. It is due to our discriminative faculty(Buddhi) being afflicted by “kleshas”. There are 5 kleshas that afflict every unenlightened person and it starts with Avidya – wrong knowledge of our existence that leads to the second klesha of “Asmita” which is a sense of “I-ness” or separation or individualism (a drop of water considering itself to be separate from the ocean). This further develops into the individual personality constantly craving things it likes – “raga”(attachment) which creates attachments to these things. When the things you are attached to are threatened or taken away or denied to you – it converts to “dvesha”. So dvesha is just an inverted form of raga. Finally all this leads to the biggest klesha which is “abhinivesha” which is commonly understood as fear of death but is actually the fear of loss of “i”dentity.

All of us have these kleshas in varying degrees and hence experience a distorted version of reality which is the Maya (illusion). Yoga is the path of overcoming kleshas – it is an experiential path that you have to consistently practice till you attain deepest levels of meditation(Samadhi).

Now whether you want to continue living in the make believe illusory world(Maya) or want to experience reality is a choice you have to make…

Spent my life trying to fill my basket

With the love of my family and friends,

with doing good deeds for the society,

with achieving wealth, power and fame and fulfilling desires,

I woke up every day with the thought that today would be the day my basket would be full, and yet my basket remained empty.

Then I came across the wisdom that life is not about accumulating but giving…

I tried giving but thought of myself as a Giver and still my basket remained empty.

Finally I sat tired and tried meditating and then descended the Guru’s Grace

“There is no Giver or Taker, my child”, said the voice.

It is then that I realised that there never was a basket to fill in the first place…

There was a time, not so long ago, that I threw caution to the wind to experience whatever it was that life had to offer.

Challenges seemed exciting, always up for the next adventure and the next smoke.

There was no pressure of performance or who I want to be, just the pleasure of friends company & the next drink

When did life take a turn for caring about carving an identity, I don’t know!

When did earning money, fame, power take precedence over wasting time on uncountable chai’s with friends, I don’t know!

When did family become a source of duty/responsibility instead of a source of joy, I don’t know!

I still feel the same within, nothing has changed and yet everything seems different. When did the creases move up from the cheeks(smile) to the forehead(frown). I don’t know!

It’s easy to fondly remember but difficult to go back. When did I lose my innocence. I don’t know.

All of us have a conscience which guides us to do the right thing, we don’t need to look anywhere else. However, we have also learned the art of overriding our conscience and doing what suits our convenience, so much so that we may no longer recognise the voice of our conscience. Funny thing is we seem to abide by our conscience if others are watching and would not mind compromising if no one is looking…
Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking. No matter how much compromised your conscience is, it would still tell you what is right. Listening to it and following it’s guidance is all that we need to do.
Today is Dussherra which signifies Rama’s win over Ravana. Both Rama and Ravana are within us: Rama represents integrity and Ravana represents compromises, we have to make a choice of who we choose to uphold.
So on this auspicious day of Dussherra make a commitment to yourself that despite the lures of the Ravana within, you will uphold the values of Rama, always…

Wish you and your loved ones a very Happy Dussherra.

The human experience is a combination of various facets put together – the body, the prana (usually represented by breathing) and the mind(including thoughts and emotions). These aspects keep changing through our life, however there is an aspect of us that is permanent and that is what is the Divinity within all sentient beings that is called by different names. To experience this Divinity you need to allow all your faculties and aspects to settle down and only then in complete silence would you be able to experience it. Spiritual pursuits deal with this inner experience…

People who are interested in externally oriented experiences usually rely on religions to give them a moral/ethical framework to live by, that attempts to answer the nagging questions at the back of the mind – is what I am doing correct or wrong? Depending on our experience or situation – we take up roles, goals and channelize all our faculties towards achieving them. However, there is no standard/person to tell you whether what you do, think, feel is right or wrong, or for that matter what is expected from you out of the life process though most religions suggest one, it is just a suggested code to live by. In truth, you have to take ownership of your own life and decide what it is that you want to achieve in how many ever hrs, days, months, years remaining which, by itself is uncertain and unknown to you.

Due to this uncertainty, most religions focus on suggesting a code of living based on morality and ethics so that the society as a whole is peace loving and co-operative. It would be great if every person adhered to such a moral/ethical code preached by whichever religion they choose to follow. Unfortunately, thats not how humans work, they stray away from morals and ethics and that is why the history of humanity is riddled with grief and pain. It would have been so much easier if everyone had adhered to a moral and ethical lifestyle but that is not to be…

So what should one do when born in a world where people follow differing moral/ethical compasses? The easier path is that of complying to the degrading order, the more difficult is to adhere by the principles of morality and ethics. People who adhere are far and few. In fact the mere compliance with a moral and ethical code is so rare that people who comply are regarded as Saints or Mahatma’s. The rest have to make do with accepting compromises that life brings their way since they have not developed their will power sufficiently to do what is right.

Ask yourself which way are you choosing – the easier or difficult? Remember, its never too late: No matter how far you have travelled down the wrong road, you can still turn around…

The spiritual journey usually begins with this question – Who am I? You have been told that you are a name, a relation, a title, a role, etc from time to time but you know that in essence you are none of those. In moments of introspection, you then enquire with your eyes closed and try to seek the answer.

Answers don’t lie in books or in listening to the Masters, the answer is within you, if only you look for it. you need to silence yourself to hear the answer. The path involves giving up attachments that are the obstacles in your path. Obstacles don’t block the path, they are the path.

Freedom is not fulfilling desires, that actually is the bondage since it requires you to keep fulfilling them to feel satiated. Its a never ending cycle. Learning to live without attachment is true freedom and the path is that of letting go…

Today is Anant Chaturdashi (Anant means infinite/eternal), wherein Ganesh Idols are consigned to water signifying that the form is impermanent and into the elements must it go in the form (idol) of the Lord but the essence is eternal and cannot be consigned to the elements since its beyond it, so the real lord remains within us.

The same analogy goes for our own existence – the body, mind and the entire world as we experience it, is temporal but the essence in us is eternal and is a part of the Divine. If we realise this and identify ourselves with our eternal essence then our lives would be transformed that moment.

Our essence is permanent and eternal we have existed before time and will exist beyond time. But as for our body, mind and other creations as the quote above says- we arrive, we celebrate, we merge into the elements.

So as we bid adieu to the form of Ganesha, let’s celebrate the “Anant” within us and stay connected with our essence instead of the impermanent, temporal world.

Life is full of expectations that are met by controlling people and/or situations. The truth however is that the only person you can control is yourself, that too with great difficulty. You have the right towards your intent, thought, actions but not towards the consequences/results of them. So you can choose your intent, thought, actions for achieving particular results and yet the desired result may not come about. Thats the nature of things, non acceptance of which is futile…

The problem lies with the fact that we make our happiness contingent upon the desired outcomes and ignore the age old wisdom of Karma Yoga – Action without expectations, possibly because we don’t know how to take action without expectations.

Expectations or goals are actually directional in nature, they are not fixed points. If you reach the goal, your goal changes, hence goals could, at best, guide you as to the direction but getting there is a factor of your own effort. If you make your joy contingent upon achieving the goal then you ignore the joy involved in the process of getting there. The journey is your life and if you don’t enjoy precious moments walking towards the goal, what makes you think that you would enjoy even after achieving your goal? and thats exactly what happens, the joy of achieving the goal is very short lived and you immediately start thinking what next? You get into the habit of stressing yourself to achieve something that would give you a joy so short lived but the habit of stressing would remain and would finally convert itself to a psychosomatic disorder.

Now ask yourself, whether you want to enjoy life – if yes, then life is in the journey and the goals are mere milestones created by you to give you a sense of progress. Don’t make your joy contingent on milestones (uncontrollable), instead make it contingent on the process of life which is more under your control…